First of all I think you should consider talking to a therapist or counselor. It usually does help, believe it or not. Pills doesn’t even have to be necessary if you go to sessions with a therapist once or twice a week. You’ll have to be patient, but it probably will work after a while. If it doesn’t, maybe you’ll have to change therapist, but if you’re willing to open up and accept the help they’ll give you, I really do think that it’ll help.
I live in Sweden so I don’t know if this goes for New Zealand, but here you can’t go to a mental institute if a psychologist, therapist or counselor doesn’t apply for you to get in. You can also get in if your parents send you to an emergency mental clinic that’ll only have you for a couple of days, except if they think you need further intensive help and then they can apply for you to go to a mental institute. So either why, you’ll have to talk to your parents or some sort of counselor.
I’ve been at a mental institute and well, I thought it was kind of relaxing. I don’t think you’d enjoy it very much if you’re not feeling very down and depressed or if you’re not extremly stressed out about some sort of pressing situation in your life. You have absolutely no freedom. You can’t have a computer and most institutes don’t allow phones either. You don’t really do much, to be honest. It doesn’t make anything much better, except that you’ll be able to get taken care of by professional caretakers twentyfour hours a day and you’ll be able to just disconnect from your life for a while, but you’ll need help when you get out anyway and they’ll send you to a counselor after you’ve been at the institute, so I really do suggest you try that out first.
You won’t die young, sweetie. Life has its ups and downs but you’ll get through it, I promise.